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Read online or Download Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want (Full PDF ebook with essay, research paper)
by Nicholas Epley


Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780307595911
Publisher:
Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group
Publication date:
02/11/2014
Pages:
272
Sales rank:
753,460
Product dimensions:
6.40(w) x 9.40(h) x 2.20(d)

Overview

 

You are a mind reader, born with an extraordinary ability to understand what others think, feel, believe, want, and know. It’s a sixth sense you use every day, in every personal and professional relationship you have. At its best, this ability allows you to achieve the most important goal in almost any life: connecting, deeply and intimately and honestly, to other human beings. At its worst, it is a source of misunderstanding and unnecessary conflict, leading to damaged relationships and broken dreams.

How good are you at knowing the minds of others? How well can you guess what others think of you, know who really likes you, or tell when someone is lying? How well do you really understand the minds of those closest to you, from your spouse to your kids to your best friends? Do you really know what your coworkers, employees, competitors, or clients want?

In this illuminating exploration of one of the great mysteries of the human mind, University of Chicago psychologist Nicholas Epley introduces us to what scientists have learned about our ability to understand the most complicated puzzle on the planet—other people—and the surprising mistakes we so routinely make. Why are we sometimes blind to the minds of others, treating them like objects or animals? Why do we sometimes talk to our cars, or the stars, as if there is a mind that can hear us? Why do we so routinely believe that others think, feel, and want what we do when, in fact, they do not? And why do we believe we understand our spouses, family, and friends so much better than we actually do? Mindwise will not turn other people into open books, but it will give you the wisdom to revolutionize how you think about them—and yourself. 

 

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
11/25/2013
In this occasionally lively, but often tedious psychological study, behavioral scientist Epley draws deeply on various experiments and surveys, deftly exploring the ways that we get into the heads of those around us to navigate various social landscapes. Our abilities to read the minds of others, he states, “allow us to cooperate with those we should trust and avoid those we shouldn’t.” Moreover, this reading of minds “allows us to track our reputation in the eyes of others... and enables understanding between friends, forgiveness among enemies, empathy between strangers.” According to Epley, we often remain unaware of others because we fail to engage our capacity to understand their minds, often dehumanizing others and, in the worst case, stereotyping them. Epley suggests that we can behave more intelligently toward others by being smarter fighters, smarter leaders, and smarter neighbors. He encourages us to look beyond an individual’s behavior to the broader context in which certain behaviors occur, for actions reveal less about a person’s mind than they seem to. Epley forcefully, though unremarkably, concludes that “the secret to understanding each other comes through the hard relational work of putting people in a position where they can tell you their minds openly and honestly.” (Feb.)

Related Subjects

  • ">Relationships - Interpersonal

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